Out of all the women in the world, including Lilith, I am considered the worst. It’s embedded in the canon, from the dark age to the modern age. I am a mad, crazy, murderous woman.
“She killed her children in cold blood.”
But their blood wasn’t cold. It was warm, hot; it smelled like the sea, splashed across my gown, my face, and my hands.
Why the furrowed brows, the condescension? The faux outrage? You don’t think that a man and his entire kingdom can drive one woman mad? Even a queen, an Empress of the Nile, draped in amethyst, lapis and gold and, yes, a Sovereign Mistress of the Desert. I am still just one person and you are many.
I was motivated by revenge? No, that’s the myth. I worked my magic from a broken heart, still filled with love.
You cannot have my sons.
They are from my womb. Their hearts beat to a rhythm from a world, now forever lost to you, one that you cannot imagine, one you will never know. You cannot write this history. The story you tell is false, fatally flawed, redacted. I am here to set the record straight.
Lillian Ann Slugocki has created a body of work on women and female sexuality, including The Erotica Project, co-authored with Erin Cressida Wilson. She’s also been published by Seal Press,Cleis Press, Heinemann Press, Newtown Press, Spuyten Duyvil Press, as well as Bloom/The Millions, Beatrice, HerKind/Vida, and Deep Water Literary Journal. Upcoming work in The Nervous Breakdown, The Dr. T.J. Eckleburg Review, and a novella, “How to Travel with Your Demons,” Spuyten Duyvil Press. You can find her on twitter, https://twitter.com/laslugocki