2 Poems | Marina Carreira

Infe(a)rno

“The path to paradise begins in hell.” Dante

Canto I.

In the womb, I fear my mother’s voice.
Every sob and sigh like acid, swimming around
like blue veins in my sea of red. I am not planned.
Not welcome or wanted with open arms.
A shot in the dark.  Or whatever God wills.

Still, I can tell that she can’t wait to have me
out of her body. I am the dark honey
she spills over the toilet, sink, sometimes
bedroom walls. When I am born, she thinks
of an ocean big enough to cover the world.

Canto II.

Under his ratty red bedspread,
I fear coming. What the fuck
will it feel like? I say. A dirty explosion.
He smirks, and I am terrified
of the hole I will leave on the bed.
Stains? I ask. Only if
it’s good, he replies.

I let his mouth dance over muscled skin,
let his dick pull childhood out of me
like a fisherman drawing back his net,
every silver fish of my flesh shaking, trembling
with ohmygod  and forced breath.

There is blood after ten days,
And I am safe from the usual side effects:
denial, regret, a lifetime of trying
to un-become my mother.

 

Fado for How I’d Like to Think You Remember Me

Imagine a mare splitting the tide
with its charging, the blue moon
cast-iron on its back as waves break
steady against its legs, its steady mane
a white flag in the wind as small hurricanes
of sand form behind
every graceful gallop.

Its eyes,           red embers.
Its ears,           a bluff’s shadow.

It’s mouth,       the astral frenzy
of a Portuguese guitar.

————
Marina Carreira is a Luso-American writer from the Ironbound area of Newark, NJ. She holds a BA in English from Montclair State University and a MFA in Creative Writing from Rutgers University. She is curator and co-host of “Brick City Speaks”, a monthly reading series at Hell’s Kitchen Lounge in Newark, NJ. Her work is featured or forthcoming in The Acentos ReviewWriting Disorder, Naugatuck River Review, Writers of the Portuguese Diaspora: An Anthology, and Paterson Literary Review.

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